Partner Births: How They Happen and What You Need to Consider

During partner-supported childbirth, a woman is accompanied by another person, typically her spouse. Keep in mind that this decision has certain specifics, including advantages and disadvantages. 

Childbirth is a process where women need the support of a close person. Therefore, partner-supported childbirth is an excellent solution. It’s not just a modern trend but a great opportunity to provide assistance and strengthen relationships with proper preparation.

Key specifics

For the most comfortable process, it is recommended for a woman to give birth with a partner in a specialized facility. This ensures a low risk of complications. Partner births imply that the expectant mother receives assistance from her spouse or another close person by mutual decision. They are possible with the husband, mother, sister. The woman independently chooses the person who will support her.

The decision is made in advance because certain preparation is required. The partner must clearly understand what to expect. As practice shows, nurses and obstetrician-gynecologists, anesthesiologists have a favorable attitude towards such a decision. It is important that the pregnant woman’s accompanying person does not interfere with the medical staff. There are some requirements for the assistant:

• he/she must be able to find the right words to calm the expectant mother;
• the opportunity to stay with the woman for a long time to help her move, change positions, visit the bathroom;
• providing moral and psychological support.

By adhering to the mentioned requirements, a loved one will provide the most effective assistance. Partner-assisted childbirth allows you to experience the birth process of the baby together. For many Western countries, such a practice has become a commonality. In Russia, this trend is gradually gaining momentum.

What You Need to Know

The main difference between partner-assisted childbirth and regular childbirth is that in addition to the mother-to-be, another person is present. All nuances are discussed in the early months of pregnancy. The partner of the expectant mother should clearly understand their responsibilities. Keep in mind that the baby delivery process can take a long time.

During partner childbirth, a man can be with the woman not all the time: from contractions to expulsive efforts or throughout the entire period from the very beginning of the childbirth process. During the initial consultation with the doctor managing the pregnancy, all details will be known. Special attention is paid to rules of conduct.

If childbirth with the husband is planned, it is necessary for the man to express the desire to be present during contractions and subsequent stages. This development can frighten many, and persuasion may disrupt family relationships. However, if the partner expresses the desire to be present, then no negative emotions will arise.

The presence of a man in the operating room during a cesarean section is prohibited. He will be able to see the child after the operation is completed, as well as meet his wife after she recovers from the general anesthesia. This also applies to any emergencies that may occur during childbirth.

How a man should behave

Partner births are only possible in a private delivery room. It is necessary to inquire in advance about this possibility with the administration of the medical facility. If the partner decides to stay from the beginning of the birth process with the woman until the very end, they can assist her in some moments:

• Counting seconds. The woman in labor is usually too preoccupied to do this. Therefore, if the expectant father starts counting seconds, the time will seem to pass much faster;
• Breathe together. The woman can maintain a certain rhythm and do everything correctly.
• Give a massage. The husband can use his fist to massage his wife’s tailbone area. It’s important to note that the massage should be intense;
• Encourage the woman. The main purpose of partner births is to make the moment of the child’s birth more pleasant both emotionally and physically;
• Provide support. During the process, a woman may want to choose the most comfortable position where the pain will be less intense. For this, she may want to hang on to something.
• Listen to the woman in labor. Do not offer your opinion or comment on the situation. Therefore, fulfill any whim of the expectant mother, even if it may seem like a caprice.

It is generally not required to undergo special tests for partner-assisted childbirth. All that is required from the partner is a chest X-ray result (valid for no more than a year). This is needed to confirm the absence of respiratory system pathology. However, it is worth clarifying this with the hospital administration.

Occasionally, it may be necessary to additionally test for HIV, hepatitis, AIDS, and syphilis. Before entering the delivery room, the husband must shower, put on clean underwear, and then change into new plastic slippers. He will be provided with a disposable suit and cap on site. Before this, the room is completely disinfected. After the childbirth process, the mother is transferred to a separate room. Her husband can rest in a separate room, but he may also stay with her.

How They Proceed

Before partner deliveries, it is important to consider all the nuances of the childbirth process. It consists of three main stages:

1. Early labor. Initially, the cervix begins to dilate. To ensure this process goes as needed, the birthing partner can assist: perform a back massage, regulate breathing together, and help change body positions. At this stage of collaborative childbirth, the woman retains considerable physical activity. Attention should also be paid to maintaining emotional well-being.
2. Pushing. The woman moves to a separate room with her partner and assumes a position for the baby’s normal exit. During the entire childbirth process, the partner may choose to leave the room. He can be the first to hold the baby, cut the umbilical cord, and capture the happy moment in photos/videos.
3. Delivery of the placenta. At this stage, the placenta is delivered. The woman no longer feels such intense pain, so the father leaves the room, and the medical staff performs all necessary tasks.

It should be considered that in partner childbirth, it is important to support the birthing mother. Only with an informed approach, attention, and care for the expectant mother can a normal childbirth process be ensured without complications.

Main Advantages

The issue of partner childbirth is very delicate and should thus be decided individually with the partner after discussing the “pros” and “cons.” The advantages and disadvantages should be thoroughly analyzed, starting with the main benefits:

1. When a woman is calm, her cervix opens faster, which positively affects the whole process;
2. The husband assists his wife during joint childbirth: he massages her back, monitors the time between contractions, helps organize proper breathing, and provides assistance in other aspects;
3. The father has the opportunity to hold the child, which forms a strong emotional bond not only during the birth process but also afterward.
4. The attachment between partners and responsibility for the family is strengthened. As men’s reviews show, their paternal instinct awakens more quickly.

Keep in mind that partner childbirth should be conducted with the consent of both parties. If the partner does not want to be present for certain reasons, it is not worth forcing them.

Main Disadvantages

Childbirth with the husband, despite numerous advantages and benefits, also has drawbacks. Keep in mind that they are not suitable for every couple. Other disadvantages of partner childbirth include:

• They should not be regarded as a fashion trend that must be followed. A woman may question the appropriateness of the innovation for various reasons: personal beliefs, cultural, or religious views. Regardless of the reason, if a woman decides that she does not want to give birth with her husband, that decision is not subject to appeal.
• If there is a tense atmosphere in the family and a woman wants to “punish” her spouse and show who has a more difficult life, it leads to greater discord in the marital relationship.
• If the man is “sensitive” — afraid of blood, feels unwell at the very sight of a hospital, then partner childbirth is not for him.
• It is not uncommon for men to be unnecessary and only get in the way. It is difficult to predict a woman’s reaction.

That is why every woman must decide at the very beginning whether she will give birth with her husband or alone. If the answer is positive, this question should be discussed with the future father of the child. Once the idea is agreed upon and decided, then you should contact a medical institution to arrange a contract for partner childbirth. Without this document, the man will not be allowed into the ward.

Preparation for the Process

Giving birth with a husband requires preparation. For fathers, training on special courses is easier than for women. Complete awareness of what is happening, a positive attitude, and having practical skills allow the woman to go through the childbirth process more easily.

In preparing for partner childbirth, an additional meeting between the husband and the doctor can yield good results. The doctor will explain in detail the main functions of the “non-staff” assistant.

Check with the administration of the medical facility in advance about the required tests for partner births, as well as the medical examinations necessary for permitting a man to be present during the childbirth process.

If a woman gives her written consent, the individual room in the medical facility is paid, and the partner does not have infectious diseases, then he receives the necessary permission.

Preparation for partner births consists of a few parts. The first part involves psychological preparation. To start, decide whether the man will be present throughout the entire period or only at the initial stages during contractions. The optimal choice is to make this decision in the first months of pregnancy. This allows enough time for thorough preparation.

The second part is dedicated to the process of childbirth and male assistance. To understand how a man can help, it is necessary to consult a doctor.

Men’s Reviews

Men’s reviews are 90% positive in nature. If a man has decided to support a woman during the process of their child’s birth, it means he understands the responsibility and readiness to help. This is possible if the man personally makes the decision to be present.

In the reviews, men mention that they went to the partner birth with their spouse not for the experience, but to help their wife. The partner performs a number of functions during the childbirth process: massaging the back, providing water, bringing a phone charger, answering calls from concerned relatives.

Partner-assisted childbirth has its specifics. Before a woman decides to give birth with her partner, this decision should be well-considered and deliberate. This scenario is not suitable for everyone and should be taken into account. 

For those who have decided, a good option is the offer from MomsLab. A special program aimed at preparing for pregnancy touches on the aspects partners need to know. The program is specifically designed for couples who have decided to prepare for the childbirth process together.